Recently I had a situation occur that upset me. It was one of those tea-kettle boiling, ready to boil over, whistling experiences. When I get that upset – both angry and hurt at the same time – I shake, I cry, and I try extremely hard not to explode. Luckily, there was a third party present to take the kettle off the heat. And I appreciate him tremendously, as I do not like to go there!!
If you’ve had a similar situation, how do you handle the aftermath? You know, the part after the sorry and let’s start fresh. There are still hurt feelings that have to be worked through. After our particular ordeal, I was still upset. I was hurt, I was crying. I didn’t want to confront the person again. After all, what’s done is done and what good would that do?
What I chose to do was email a friend of mine and tell her the story of what happened. And you know what? By the time I had finished emailing, I had quit crying. Would it have worked if I had called her and talked about it? I don’t know. Chances are the emotions would still have been running on high, but writing about it helped me work through them much easier. And while the next day it was still on my mind, it wasn’t my focus.
My grandmother used to write in her diary every evening. Was that her therapy? Did she look back over the day and “chew” over what had happened? I don’t know. I never thought to ask her when she was alive why she wrote in her diary every night. But chances are, if I had to bet, I’d say it was her therapy.
I’ve heard it from several life coaches, writers, etc., that writing is therapy. I encourage you to get a journal – either old-fashioned pen and paper – or use a computer software and write! Write about your day, the good, the bad, and the ugly. If you could do it again, what would you do differently? It doesn’t have to be something you share with anybody – unless you want to. But take some time every day to mull over things and put it on paper. And more than just “I went to the grocery store today, I cooked beans and cornbread for dinner” type things. Write about your emotions, your feelings.
I have recently started using iDailyDiary. I not only use it for venting, I also use it for ideas and keeping track of to-dos. It’s become a handy little program!